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October 27, 2017 9:09 pm

Violence Against Women Must Stop

Saturday, September 17, 2016 @ 7:00 AM
March to end violence against women proceeds along 7th Avenue Friday night.  Photo 250News

March to end violence against women proceeds along 7th Avenue Friday night. Photo 250News

Prince George, B.C. – The message is starkly clear, violence against women, meaning young girls, adult women and elderly women, must end.

A march honouring women who have suffered violence and not survived as well as women who have survived both physical and sexual violence was held in downtown Prince George Friday evening.

The Take Back the Night march returned to the city after being put on hold last year.  And the message that was repeatedly impressed upon the minds of the people who gathered at City Hall by the five speakers who addressed them was that violence against women cannot and must not be tolerated by any facet within our society.

The co-chair of the Surpassing Our Survival (SOS) Society and associate professor at UNBC, Dawn Hemingway, noted that “this is the 24th annual Take Back the Night in Prince George.  Congratulations women.  Take Back the Night is something that is dear to the hearts of all of us.  It recognizes and is a memorial to those women who have been lost to violence, recognizing those who have survived and also fighting as hard as we can and as consistently as we can to end all violence.

Hemingway pointed out that “in Prince George, beginning in 1992, with a number of community agencies and activists coming together, we had our first Take Back the Night march.  And although I think we can all say that we’ve made some progress over the years, facts about domestic violence, about sexual violence in British Columbia show very clearly that we have a long way to go.”

“Some of those facts are that every year in British Columbia there are over 60,000 physical or sexual assaults against women, almost all of them committed by men.  Only 12% of sexual assaults against women are reported to the police.  Over 60% of British Columbians personally know at least one woman who has been sexually or physically assaulted.  One in three women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime, and nationally the number of missing and murdered indigenous women is an unspeakable crime.”

“We know all too well about the women who are missing in the downtown of Vancouver and very close to us in northern B.C., we can virtually see it from here, is (Highway 16).  This is a situation that shows us and is a constant reminder of just how completely unacceptable the current situation is and how there is so very much left to be done.”

“And there is also violence against older women, violence that is often invisible and simply categorized as elder abuse.  Within northern British Columbia we have the fastest-growing aging population in the province.  Ending violence against older women is of crucial importance.  This violence must not remain hidden.”

She says ending violence against women has to be a priority of more than just the volunteers, front line workers and family members who have limited or no resources.  “It must be a priority,” she says “of governments at all levels and not just in words.  We need commitment of resources, concrete steps that actually support women experiencing violence.  Words are not enough.”

Prince George-Mackenzie MLA Mike Morris, who is also BC’s Minister of Public Safety and Solicitor-general, revealed that “domestic violence is something that I grew up with as a small child and lived through all kinds of torturous situations within our household.  And as a police officer for 32 years I saw the results of domestic violence and sexual abuse throughout British Columbia.  It’s a priority for our government to address it, it’s something that we need to stop.”

“We’ve got a vision to have a violence-free BC.  As Dawn said, we have a long way to go, and without everybody’s help and participating and everybody’s oar in the water we won’t get there.”

He noted the government’s Say Something campaign and said “from my experience there’s too many people that don’t say anything.  They live next door, they’ve got relatives, they don’t say anything they don’t support the individual who is being subjected to the domestic violence or sexual abuse, and it goes on and on and on for years.”

“The other part of that is very few sexual abuse situations are reported to the police.  The criminal process that we have in Canada is to the letter of the law and it needs to be that way, but we need to find a different process that, if somebody is subjected to sexual abuse we need to find a process that is safe for them to come and speak to somebody in authority, somebody to disclose what has taken place to them, and safe for the individual that was responsible for committing those crimes to admit to it and find some kind of a resolution without going through that visceral criminal process that we have, where you’re disclosing intimate details to the police and then disclosing that when it comes to trial.”

Lisa Loewen with the John Howard Society said the Stop Taking it Out on your Partner (STOP) program is something “where we teach men how to be healthy individuals and how to have better ways to communicate and how to really learn to love themselves.  We strongly believe that if we have healthy men, we’re going to have healthy women.”

“I stand in front of you as a victim of rape and domestic violence, but also as a survivor.  Each and every one of us here knows somebody who’s been down the road of being hurt, and we know that hurt people hurt.  So I, from the bottom of my heart, want to extend love to everybody on this full moon night, where we can embrace the power of women.  Whether we are mothers or not we are mothers to each other, and that matters.”

UNBC professor of Social Work, Si Transken, said “I turned 56 this week, my father sexually abused me through my whole childhood and the last five years we’ve been going through the court system with this story.  We started with seven of us who were prepared to go to court against him.  He’s been able to change his lawyer three times, I’m not sure where it’s all going to end, the next court date is August 26th.  So, maybe I’ll stand up here again next year, and the year after and the year after.”

She questions whether there are enough structures in place to help victims, enough police officers, lawyers, para-legals.  It’s not enough to just have people say kind things to each other and notice what your neighbour has gone through.  If my mother had been able to leave when we were children, he was beating her up also, he probably still is, if she’d been able to leave, get a good-paying job with a decent minimum wage, had there been adequate subsidized housing, had there been all kinds of structural supports, this kind of stuff is way bigger than a hug and words and showing up.”

“It’s structural stuff.  My understanding is 37 women’s resource shelters lost one hundred percent of their funding about ten years ago.  Those resource centres were places that would have helped women, would have supported women who are like my mother.”

“So having said that,” stated Transken, “you might notice that I’m a little bit sour and bitchy.  I wear it proudly.”

With that the crowd of women and children headed out on a 30-minute walk through a portion of the downtown core, proclaiming their right to be there with chants of “Women unite, take back the night” “No more silence, no more violence” and “Wherever we go, however we dress, No means No and yes means yes.”

Comments

I find this an aooensive gender biased protest and article and am surprised it is allowed in this so called enlightened age.

What about the violence against men and children by women, like to see this biased group address that.

Do a google, many studies out there

Research showing that women are often aggressors in domestic violence has been causing controversy for almost 40 years, ever since the 1975 National Family Violence Survey by sociologists Murray Straus and Richard Gelles of the Family Research Laboratory at the University of New Hampshire found that women were just as likely as men to report hitting a spouse and men were just as likely as women to report getting hit. The researchers initially assumed that, at least in cases of mutual violence, the women were defending themselves or retaliating. But when subsequent surveys asked who struck first, it turned out that women were as likely as men to initiate violence—a finding confirmed by more than 200 studies of intimate violence. In a 2010 review essay in the journal Partner Abuse, Straus concludes that women’s motives for domestic violence are often similar to men’s, ranging from anger to coercive control.

ht tp://time.com/2921491/hope-solo-women-violence/

How about stopping all domestic violence and not turn it into gender specific.

    You, and your comment, gets absolutely no sympathy from me! Nice attempt at victim role reversal though.

    I agree, there is violence everywhere in relationships, and I am quite surprised there are no walks done for kids.

“Some of those facts are that every year in British Columbia there are over 60,000 physical or sexual assaults against women, almost all of them committed by men. Only 12% of sexual assaults against women are reported to the police. Over 60% of British Columbians personally know at least one woman who has been sexually or physically assaulted. One in three women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime, and nationally the number of missing and murdered indigenous women is an unspeakable crime.” …… These facts have been known by all except the new virulent fact resistant humans that we must endure regardless of how rediculas they are . They need a museum . I suggest crowd funding for a facility on Fogo island right next to the museum of the flat earth society . I’m sure the man from willow river would be a perfect curator.

Without using google, start naming all the serial killers that you know in your mind. Now why are all those serial killers men?

Lets start with Prince George’s own youngest serial killer in Canada; someone seamutt would sympathize with, after all he completely ignored the “in your face” murders of four young women here in Prince George. Then there is the one “man” by the name of Robert William Pickton ending the lives of 49 women.

Be careful seamutt, some will judge you by what you post!

    In modern times , I believe Jimmie Jones holds the record . This is one subject I’m not searching . Ever . Some things one just can’t unread , see , or hear , eeeewwwwwww .

    Are you saying that there were no female serial killers?

    I might be able to name a couple of serial killers who were male without looking them up. It is not the type of information I require to help me through everyday life.

    I do, However, know that there were many female serial killers. I ask know that there were many female murderers, most of whom are not known to people without looking up databases.

    I also know that when one speaks about violence against anyone, violence which caused death is not the most common violence.

    There are many other kinds of violence which are life changing, life disruptive. If one can only think of murder as violence, then you have not begun to understand violence which is perpetrated upon another human or animal.

    Never heard of Aileen Wournos? Lizzy Borden? Plus there have been multitudes of black widows who have murdered more than one husband for money. Again your rush to shove your foot in your mouth to try to discredit someone on this site is so obvious.

      Reading comprehension problems again Bent? Please show me in my comment where I said All Men were serial killers? My comment specifically states; “…start naming all the serial killers that you know in your mind.” I said this knowing full well that most people will only remember the most notorious serial killers who are all men!

      Of course I know who Aileen Wournos is, and I did not have to google female serial killers like you did to find out. I also watch a movie about her called “Monster” where Charlize Theron won an Academy Award for playing her as the main character.

      Bent, there are five stages; denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. I believe you and some others are at the anger stage! Not to worry, you will eventually learn to accept the truth.

      Lady down the street from where I grew up went through five husbands in five years… All were healthy and then just dropped dead. She was a nasty piece of work chasing kids off her lawn when we played road hockey and meanest witch ever to her husbands. We called her the hunch back of the pigeons because she had hundreds of them. Every time she had a new husband all the neighbourhood knew the guy was condemned, it was just a matter of time.

    “Without using google, start naming all the serial killers that you know in your mind. Now why are all those serial killers men?” .. sure sounds to me like you think no one has heard of any women serial killers without looking it up. I just gave you a couple of examples that WEREN’T men and didn’t have to look it up therefore your statement and challenge to the readers here has no value. Delusions of grandeur are symptoms of closed minded people.

I agree with your last sentence Seamutt! The fact that the 2 clowns responded negatively means that there is substance in what you say!

All it takes is a simple search for the facts. Another fact is one of the bigger risks to a child under three is their own mother.

Yes there have been female serial killers. Again another simple search will do.

Maybe you should fault mike Morris . His words were the ones used in the artical in regards to the domestic violence . It is interesting that someone would want to try to delegitimize women in domestic violent homes, that may be marching with their fellow victims/support groups based on a USA study . Perhaps a Russian study would be more apt a comparison for PG .

    Why would a study done by American experts be any less legitimate than one done by Canadians? Are you one of those “fact resistant humans” that you describe above?

      No, the facts in the article have settled in quite nicely . They come from a BC study . I don’t understand why anyone would need to blur the issue . What would motivate someone to do so ? There are exceptions to every rule . That’s why we have rules in the first place . Exceptions have never out weighed the rule . Simple stuff .

      Except that you are missing the original point that Seamutt made. Violence is not a gender specific problem, both men & women are perpetrators & aggressors on the same scale. Why is this point continually swept under the proverbial carpet, or worse, the reaction that both you & Peoplebeingsophicjgaltfirst displayed, which is to immediately & personally attack the questioner. This issue has been studied & documented by many experts including Dr. Don Sutton & Dr. Deborah Capaldi. Violence to solve problems or make a point is wrong & every facet of the problem should be addressed, not just one angle.

I have stated on this site, on numerous occasions, that we should address all issues of violence!

I once asked the head of a Woman’s Resources Centre, if they are so concerned about violence against women, why are they are so silent on the increase in violence by women, against women. I was told that it’s not part of their mandate!

Due to her demeanor and tone of voice, obviously bringing up the subject of violence committed BY women AGAINST women is one of those “politically incorrect” subjects!

How sad that only some forms of violence are worthy of discussion!

As I’ve stated before, we need to address and work towards eliminating all forms of violence!

Welp, this discussion thread is free falling into the basement, and its easy to see who is bringing it there.

    It’s the fact thing again . Did you also read the line ” Almost all committed by men ” ? That was one of the facts from our bc study . It seems to have disapeared from a few little grey cells . Or can it be nullified by another study ?Or is it also geographic ?

      I think seamutt saw the “Violence Against Women Must Stop” headline and broke into his violence against men rant without reading the full story. Then a couple the local sheep followed suit and voila; we have a discussion headed for the crapper.

      I tried taking a stand against his brand of misogyny in a previous story on this topic, but my comments were deleted, too bad… violence against women is a serious subject deserving of some serious discussion.

      Yes, a serious discussion about violence is long overdue. Unfortunately you & others seem incapable of such discussion as you just cannot seem to stop trying to belittle, bully & insult others. How could anyone take anything you write or say seriously? Do you not see the irony of your “stand”? I read your comments last night & they were deserving of instant removal. Try having a rational discourse with someone without resorting to personal attacks, watch your credibility rise.

      detoe44; your comment is a perfect example of why this discussion is going into the crapper. You start off parroting the words “Yes, a serious discussion about violence is long overdue.” Heck I was looking forward to reading what you were going to contribute to that discussion but the rest of your comment just an attack against me.

      The story is about “violence against women”, this discussion should be about “violence against women”, why is that such a difficult concept to grasp?

      Read my posts above, Google the authors & the research that they have done. My comment was not an attack, it was an observation directed at you…& others, read it again. Then go back & read your own comments. Yes the article is about violence towards women, however the discussion thread has taken on a whole new parameter, one that some just cannot wrap their minds around. That violence is a human problem, that women are as capable & complicit in domestic violence in the same degree as men. A serious discussion about violence cannot go forward with any meaning until those issues are addressed. A discussion where personal attacks are left out. Are you up to that?

What I have seen over 40 years is men getting in to a relationship and doing their level best to control their partner, then it’s on to controlling the children. Unfortunately these disgusting men have low self esteem and they have to do something to get their self esteem back and this is what they do. Fortunately we have these advocates who assist women and remove them from the situation. It is extremely hard for a mother with children to get out of these situations since there is the loss of finances, be it a welfare cheque, or a wage that their partner brings to the table. And the mother and children suffer. Sickening cycle.

    Completely factual and true, add to that, children growing up in an atmosphere of domestic violence, where the violent behavior of the father becomes “normalized” and “learned”. This is the reason a large percentage of men engaging in domestic violence were raised in domestically violent homes themselves.

    ht tps://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2000/11/001106061128.htm

“violence against women is a serious subject deserving of some serious discussion”

Agree.

The problem as I see it is that for someone to begin another such a movement about other human violence to other humans and animals is not likely to get much traction because there is a felling that it will lessen the awareness raising efforts of violence against women.

It is as if humans are not able to promote more than one awareness raising movement at a time.

When will others get their turn?

Look at the posts on this topic here to see that it appears that having multiple awareness raising efforts is useless due to the infighting it causes!!

We speak about the highway of tears. There are many other highway killers.

One of them was Aileen Wuornos who was known as the Florida Highway Killer.

Between 1989 and 1990 she murdered 7 men. She supported herself and her lover Tria through prostitution.

Her claim was that the murders were in self defense against men who attempted to rape her.

The court felt otherwise. She was executed by the state in 2002.

A 1992 study of 215,273 homicide looked at the gender-specific differences in rates of fatal violence and victimization.

Although women comprise more than half the U.S. population, they committed only 14.7% of the homicides noted during the study interval.

In contrast to men, who killed nonintimate acquaintances, strangers, or victims of undetermined relationship in 80% of cases, women killed their spouse, an intimate acquaintance, or a family member in 60% of cases.

ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/1635092

While murder is a violent act, we should not be dwelling on that since there are by far many more violent acts humans impose on each other in familial relationships and other relationships.

I think part of the problem is that many people, not all, only advocate for “we need to focus on all forms of violence”, when they observe groups like Take Back the Night fighting against specific types of violence. They are nowhere to be seen otherwise. It makes their comments come across as completely disingenuous.

I don’t see it as much different than people who say that all races should be treated equally, when commenting on the activities of groups who are focused on eliminating racism that is directed towards one particular group.

Of course we should be worried about all forms of violence, that goes without saying. When addressing a big issue though, sometimes it’s effective to break it into smaller contributing components and focus on those individually. After all, they will often have unique considerations and unique solutions.

I think people need to learn to not get so offended or upset if one groups “fight” does not resonate with themselves. If you are that passionate, don’t work against people who are trying to make a difference. Find your own “fight”, get out there, lead the charge and contribute to the overall solution.

    Well stated!!

“I think part of the problem is that many people, not all, only advocate for “we need to focus on all forms of violence”, when they observe groups like Take Back the Night fighting against specific types of violence. They are nowhere to be seen otherwise. It makes their comments come across as completely disingenuous.” Except that there is very little discussion around the other forms of violence, outside of academic papers & personal one on one discussion. When was the last time you heard of or went to a forum that spoke to the very real problem of violence towards men? The moment a person brings up these other facets of this issue they are immediately attacked (see above). I have no issue with Take Back the Night or other forms of protest or discussion. What I do have issue with is when other facets of this problem are relegated to the back burner, ignored or outright ridiculed & denounced. That is when, in my opinion, comments become disingenuous.

    Also well stated.

    I agree.

As usual jgalt and ataloss can only respond with personal attacks, very mature.

Okay . Your pain is as strong as the women , girls and and supporters have and are suffering . Perhaps you should organize a men and boys against women’s violence against men and boys March . Perhaps international men’s day November 19th would be appropriate . That time of year would prevent any of those violent women and girls from being able to rain on YOUR march for dignity .

Good idea Ataloss, perhaps gay men can attend your function as well seamutt, everyone knows how much more they are victims of violence than straight men. Men are men, right seamutt? Looking forward to you organizing and standing up for the brotherhood.

    And many also know how much women do not like it when laws allow transgendered men to use women’s washrooms.

    For every situation one can find an opposing situation whether it is gender based, colour based, racially based, ethnically based, religiously based, financially based, educationally based, language based, astrologically based … whatever.

    Humans cannot stay away from judging another human based on differences and similarities.

    It is s survival instinct.

I am surprised that no one brings up the issue of mental illness. To me that is almost central to all violence for both the perps and sometimes even the victims. Mad as hell bat shit crazy and can’t find their drugs to medicate, so the whole world becomes their enemy and the first person they can pick on they do… which is usually the weakest person they can pick on woman, man, or child. Most all violence I’ve ever heard of follows either that pattern, or alcohol induced little man syndrome.

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