The Vancouver Canucks may not be the best team in the NHL, but on paper, they lead the Canadian bunch.

 

The Canucks open their season Saturday at home against Los Angeles. Expectations are very high and with top end players at all positions the time has arrived for the Canucks to make “noise”.

 

Vancouver is the only elite team among Canadian clubs, even though Montreal reached the Stanley Cup semi-finals last season.

 

Here is an analysis of each team from Canada starting in the West:

 

Vancouver: Key additions Dan Hamhuis & Keith Ballard will lead the defensemen. With Kevin Bieksa, Christian Ehrhoff and Alex Edler returning, Vancouver has one of the better groups of blue liners in the league. 

 

Hamhuis, a former P.G. Cougars captain, had a good pre-season after signing that six-year, $27 million deal. The 27-year-old Smithers native can be a shutdown defenceman but with additional power play time will provide more offence than he did with Nashville.

 

Roberto Luongo surrendered the “C”. Slight groin pulls or not, Canuck fans do not want to hear any more excuses from him.

 

Scoring should not be an issue. The Sedins are in their prime. Ryan Kesler & Mikael Samuelsson lead the best of the rest forwards. Optimism in Vancouver appears to be justified.

Calgary: The Flames rank as perhaps, the most underachieving team last season. Somehow, General Manager Darryl Sutter kept his job, although the Flames wisely signed ex Tampa GM Jay Feaster as Sutter’s assistant.

 

Olli Jokinen and Alex Tanguay were the two big off-season acquisitions, and as a result, another uninspiring season appears around the corner. Actually, I have to admit I like the addition of Brendan Morrison.

 

Jarome Iginla is still a leader but he is fading. Miika Kiprusoff is strong in Goal but has lapses. Jay Bouwmeester tops the blue line, but based on his first year in Calgary, he is overrated.

 

The Flames have not won a playoff series since their appearance in the 2003-04 final. This streak is likely not in jeopardy.

 

Edmonton:

 

When a team is last in the league, there is nowhere to move, but up. Just ask the Prince George Cougars.

 

The Oilers have a bright future with forwards Taylor Hall, Magnus Paajarvi-Svensson and Jordan Eberle, but that future will not be this season.

 

Playmaker Ales Hemsky and goalie Nikolai Khabibulin must stay healthy for Edmonton to be competitive. Khabibulin also needs to refrain from going to the bar.

 

With disgruntled ex-Cougar Sheldon Souray out of the picture, the defense is made up of  journeymen.

 

It is hard to believe that as recent as 2006 the Oilers were in the Stanley Cup final. However, Edmonton has not made the playoffs since that year and they will not qualify again this season.

 

 

Toronto: How long will it take before the Leafs jokes start again? The good news is Toronto will improve. The bad news is rising marginally from 29^th will not keep the comedy writers silent.

 

Kris Versteeg, a welcome addition, worked well with Phil Kessel during the pre-season. However, Toronto still lacks depth at the forward position. The Leafs may be putting too much pressure on new captain Dion Phaneuf; however, a number of experienced blue liners (Tomas Kaberle, Mike Komisarek, and Francois Beauchemin) surround him. JS Giguere and Jonas Gustavsson should provide competent goaltending.

 

Until proven otherwise, keep in mind they are still the Maple Leafs.

 

 

Ottawa: The Senators are a middle of the pack team with huge concerns in goal. The tandem of Pascal Leclaire and Brian Elliott has a history of being inconsistent.

 

Sergei Gonchar is past his prime but still a good addition on defense. The line-up includes a lot of veteran presence including forwards Daniel Alfredsson, Jason Spezza, Mike Fisher, Alex Kovalev, and defenceman Chris Phillips. However, Spezza is the Carey Price of the team, as some fans get impatient with him.

 

The Senators will qualify for the playoffs, at best.

 

Montreal: The Canadiens decision to trade playoff hero Jaroslav Halak to St. Louis remains a mystery. The pressure is now on goalie Carey Price and one can sense that it could be a long winter for the Anahim Lake, B.C. native. Getting booed in the pre-season does not bode well for his confidence.

 

P.K. Subban, a pleasant playoff surprise, looks ready to help the defense, which is anchored by Hal Gill, Josh Gorges, and Roman Hamrlik.

 

Scoring will be a concern. Small forwards Brian Gionta (new captain), Mike Cammalleri, and Scott Gomez need to lead and provide offence.

 

Montreal should challenge for the playoffs, but I suspect the Habs will have the biggest drop of the six teams from Canada.

 

 

On paper, it is not promising for Canadian teams except for Vancouver. However, we all know what appears to be the case in autumn can be quite different come spring.

 

 

A number on the box of Chad Ochocinco's cereal leads to a phone sex line. He is now the top wide receiver in fantasy points.

A statue of King Tut's grandfather has been unearthed in Egypt. So, was it wearing a Packers or Vikings jersey?

 

 

Contributor Bill Littlejohn of South Lake Tahoe, California

 

The world's oldest man turned 114 in Montana. He said one of his fondest childhood memories was watching Brett Favre play quarterback.

 

Cam Hutchinson of the Saskatoon StarPhoenix

 

 

Conflicting stories out of Brooklyn where an assistant high school football coach was fired for mooning fans. The coach claims it was just a momentary crack-up while school officials say the man bottomed out completely.

 

 

Tennessee was on the verge of a major upset of LSU, and indeed had celebrated when a “4th and goal” by the Tigers went for naught. But the Vols were called for too many men on the field. Not 12, but 13. On the bright side, players on the University of Tennessee team immediately all qualified for a tryout with the Saskatchewan Roughriders.

 

Former New York governor Eliot Spitzer said in an interview with a U.S. magazine last weekend, 'You learn more by losing than by winning.' Which means the Toronto Maple Leafs might be the smartest team in North America. 

Janice Hough of Palo Alto, California (www.leftcoastsportsbabe.com)

 

The FBI arrested a terror suspect after he left a fake bomb near Cubs offices in Chicago. Isn't one Wrigley Field disaster a season enough?

 

 

 

So it turns out that Al Qaeda's threats to attack somewhere in Europe are the second scariest thing on the continent, right behind the Knicks playing exhibition games in Italy.

 

 

 

The New York Knicks are practicing in Paris despite warnings about terrorist attacks. As it turns out, the only thing scaring Europeans is the way the Knicks play.

 

 

A new Swedish study says women in the 40's should get mammograms. I guess women with smaller boobs are just on their own.

 

 

 

The NFL supported women’s cancer with pink gloves, chinstraps and personal breast exams by players after the games.

 

 

 

 

A 33-year-old Ohio woman was arrested for flashing her breasts during a youth football team practice. Police have not announced which Bengal she is married to.

(Editors note: It appears we have a leading candidate for this week's booby prize)