I will never be a computer nerd. Once upon a time my good friend David Chalk (whose media career I kick started) loaned me a book by some cat named Negroponte so that I could understand how digital works. I bogged down – it’s the truth – on the first line on the first page! But though no nerd and in fact utterly ignorant on these matters I’ve come a long way since 1981 when I got that Xerox computer which was black and white, took immense floppies that had to be “initialized” (whatever the hell that means), had no “mouse” and which had no automatic “save” so that at the critical moment in doing my work it went into “lock” sending my efforts into the ether.

My how things have changed! With the arrival of the mouse and other features of modern computerism I find myself wondering how I ever satisfied my craving for writing in days of yore. My only problem now is what the devil do I do with all those floppies now that I use the memory stick that stores multi times what the floppy used to do.

I have made advances. I now buy books and stuff on the Internet and make most travel arrangements that way. If someone had told me back in 1981 that I would be doing these things I would have said they were daft.

My real advance has been in iPods. When I got my first one in March it was with great trepidation and for good reason. I drove the Apple people nuts with questions. This was because I don’t understand computers and must learn the moves by rote. Now I have three iPods and Wendy has one. I’m listening to my Classical one now and at my side have the one on Jazz and the other on Folk, Country and the like. It’s bluddy marvelous, it is.

I still won’t have a cell phone except in the car in case of emergencies. I hate telephones and always have. Cell phones have too many doo-dads for me and besides, who do I want to hear from when I’m not home? And why is that people who use these monstrosities are always talking to someone who is stone deaf?

I’ve come a long way. I’ve seen many good changes to my life because of the computer. I’ve also learned, from both the cell phone and television that many improvements are simply designed so that nerds can show off their knowledge while users of a certain age shake their fists and yearn for the day that changing channels and operating a telephone were, if not enjoyable could at least be used without needing a certificate from The BC Institute of Technology.